Neck Sprain

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Many things guys do are stupid. Today's focal of stupidity will be on arm-wrestling.

Commonly misunderstood to be a ritual for guys to showcase biceps to their female counterparts, the excercise actually has many hidden layers of understanding; including embedded-pain that bounces alive once in awhile to bite you square in your ass.

Yesterday saw another 5 hour TVPROD class, where we always manage to extend our class hours. It was then decided that we would determine each other's strength. Justin happens to be quite strong, curling 12 with one arm is no problem for him. ( T_T 12 in one arm )

So it starts with right hand, which I lost, then left hand which I manage to win (most of the time) Perhaps its because I'm ambi-dexterous in some way.

So, we went to eat dinner, finish up MM, and leave for home.

Awoke with my maid chanting some arabic to me, she thinks she's speaking english but I've no idea what the hell shes trying to say. Char calls, and tells me to submit my work... next thing I realise when I try to get up, a sharp pain on my shoulder neck. The muscles contract so much that I'm unable to move.

Long story short: I went to see pharmacists, who wouldnt sell me meds because they think I'm some kind of idiot who cannot diagnose his own condition. 34 bucks fly as the clinic prescribes some muscle relaxants for me. Seems like I've gotten NECK SPRAIN.

The irony of this was that a week ago I just did my TVPROD on kayan women; the ones with the long long necks. Went to sleep again after applying some salompas almost my age.

Awoke again, this time the muscle spasms got even stronger. When I try to tilt my neck past a certain degree the muscle spasams come and I'm incapacitated for a while. Seriously retarded.

So my dad comes back and brings me to see some sinseh.

If you recall my post on scam doctors this one will top it.

Calling themselves TCM (The Con Men), these sinsehs are adept at discerning your illness even without you talking. I entered the room and before one word left my mouth.

"Take off your shirt and sit facing the wall"

I was like wtf? I havent even say anything? Maybe its diagnoses, so I proceeded. Next he removed my hand, which I was placing on my shoulder to prevent my neck from turning. I was about to tell him what my hand was doing there when he said.

"Too heaty, curry, biscuits spicy food eat less, drink more cooling tea and eat fruits"

I heard the bottle cap flip open and suddenly PIAK. he started slapping all over my back. Occasionally he would scratch and scratch I swear I assumed he was an enraged oversized cat pawing on me.

Thirty seconds into the "treatment" he starts slapping down hard on my shoulder, PIAK PIAK PIAK, which I really wanted to turn around and smack him so hard he'd need plastic (actually hes quite ugly already). Moving quickly he puts his hands around my head and starts to do the wavy wavy thing. Telling me to look left he pulls slightly, then he said I was being too stiff.

I relaxed abit and he suddenly jerks right, I swear I almost changed my name to lettuce, luckily nothing dislocated. He ends the session by throwing my dad a bottle of ointment. and 24 dollars flew away.

Masters of treatment, they can tell what's wrong with you in a single glance. Opening your mouth is unnecessary and a backrub like this cures everything. Scam-of-the-year...

If I really wanted a backrub I would have at least gone to one of those sleazy places at bukit timah. 24 dollars for a man rubbing my back and slapping me so hard is retarded.

Justin; this is your fault. I don't care.




3 packs, 6 salompas, so how much pain am I in?

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